Shopping for Mom can be stressful. She's the woman who brought you into the world, who cleaned your face with her own spit when you were little, who asked you on a daily basis if you were raised in a barn (and did so lovingly). There's no gift that can thank her for all that she does, but here are 10 that absolutely no one should ever give to Mom:

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    1

    An E-card

    She may thank you. She may even say, "That was very sweet," in her email response to your e-card, but just know that she's staring at her computer screen with her jaw hung open and dreams of jewelry and the spa crumbling all around her.

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    2

    A Headache

    If there's one day that you really do need to use your inside voice, it's Mother's Day. It doesn't matter how hard your sister just kicked you beneath the table, you smile and bite your tongue—no screaming. Today is the one day Mom shouldn't have to seek refuge in the bathroom.

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    3

    Gas Station Flowers

    Your mom prepared you countless meals, suffered through hours of watching 'Barney,' and fed and cleaned the pet you PROMISED you'd take care of. She deserves better than something you pick up at the gas station.

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    A Wet Bottom

    Don't leave the toilet seat up. And clean up after yourself. What, were you raised in a barn or something?

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    An Infomercial Product

    Do you really want your mom knowing how much late-night TV you watch? Try to avoid any gifts with a call-within-15-minutes-and-receive-a-free-Ginsu-knife offer.

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    A Guilt Trip

    It doesn't matter if she takes every opportunity she can to provide you with an all-expenses-paid round-trip ticket to the Land of Guilt—on Mother's Day you don't send her there, no matter how much money you've had to drop in therapy because of her.

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    Any Cleaning or Cooking Product

    Sure, the gal in the Swiffer commercial may look ecstatic, like her new mop thing is the greatest gift she ever received. But we can guarantee that your mom absolutely will not have that same look on her face if you give her something to help her keep cleaning up after everyone as a Mother's Day gift.

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    8

    A Self-Help Book

    On Mother's Day, your mom is a completely perfect being who couldn't improve anything about herself and therefore doesn't need a self-help book (even if she really does).

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    9

    Cash

    Your intentions may be in the right place, and you're right that your mom would definitely pick something out for herself better than you can, but hit somewhere other than the ATM for her Mother's Day gift.

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    10

    Excuses

    Maybe there IS a logical explanation for why your bed has yet to be made. Save it. No excuses on Mother's Day.

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