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Late for Work? Don’t Give These Outlandish Reasons Why (And Keep Your Job)

We’ve all been there: we’re running late for work for reasons our boss won’t like. When searching for an explanation that’ll pass mustard, here are some you should definitely avoid.

CareerBuilder has come out with a list of “Most Outrageous Excuses for Being Late to Work.” Let’s just say this is probably what happens when the kid who says “My dog ate my homework” grows up and gets a job.

Here are some of the the most absurd reasons people have given for being late to work, according to a survey of 2,500 hiring managers and 3,200 employees.

  • I thought of quitting today, but then decided not to, so I came in late.
  • I had to chase my cows back into the field.
  • My lizard had to have emergency surgery in the morning and died during surgery. I had to mourn while deciding whether to have the lizard disposed of by the vet or bring the lizard corpse with me to work.
  • There was fresh powder on the hill. I had to go skiing.
  • I had to finish watching My Name is Earl.
  • All of my clothes were stolen.
  • I was confused by the time change and unsure if it was “spring forward” or “fall back.”
  • A Vaseline truck overturned on the highway and cars were slipping left and right.

It sounds like workers need to come up with an explanation why they’re not on the clock when they should be — about 25% say they’re late for work once a month, while 13% say it happens once a week.

There is some good news, though — 33% of employers are okay if their underlings show up late every once in a while, as long as it does turn into a trend.

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